NAME GAME: ISIS HOLDS EMERGENCY MEETING TO CHOOSE NAME FOR ITS WAR ON THE WORLD

Senior members of ISIS convened an emergency meeting in response to the long-awaited naming by the United States of its military mission against the Islamic State.

The Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, Gen. Martin Dempsey, announced last week that the US-led effort against ISIS in Iraq and Syria would be called Operation Inherent Resolve, after it was decided that Operation “Oh no, not again” was too downbeat.

Meeting at a hookah lounge on the outskirts of the Syrian town of Kobani on the Turkish border, high ranking ISIS personnel, including the group’s leader, Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi, narrowed down the list of possible names to six:

  • Operation Caliphate, Rebooted
  • Operation Headbangers Ball
  • Operation Jihadi Jitterbug
  • Operation House of the Rising Sunni
  • Operation Saber Dance
  • Operation Enduring Crucifixion

al-Baghdadi, known only for knowing his Claret from his Beaujolais, is a figure shrouded in mystery. The ISIS chieftain has been widely credited with turning the group into the most trend-worthy terrorist organization on Twitter and with a dedicated and deeply disturbed following on Instagram.

The convening of a war room to come up with a snazzy name for ISIS’ military operation is believed to be al-Baghdadi’s attempt at branding its war on the world with a catchy, feel good title which will help them reclaim interest that has been lost as everyone freaks out about Ebola.

Check out another Magnum opus here.

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